Engracia Le: 2007

I learned a new word today, "contentment."

Derived from two latin words, "con" and "tenio". This word means, "to hold together."

Knowing this, this scripture takes on more meaning to me,

"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to be plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:12-13

Life itself presents many uncertainties and inner struggles. Being rich and satisfied doesn't guarantee contentment. Being on top isn't always comfortable. There is the nagging fear of falling down hard.

My husband and I are now in a very uncertain phase of life called, "job hunting." Despite my career background, there is always a fear of not getting the job I want. Moreover, there can be anxieties of what the future holds.

This is a time to muster the strength to have inner solidity, contentment. This is when I need to hold together in order to keep calm and peace despite life's uncertainties. I am grateful that I have a great God who I can always turn to for strength and hope. That is what the scripture says, "I can do everything through Him who gives me strength."

Deep inside I know that I am where I am because God has designed me to be here. And being in my shoe right now is beautiful. I know that God has allowed Joe and me to go through the roller coaster ride of life because we have important roles to fulfill.

When I think about that greater purpose, I start collecting inner peace. Somehow I know that God does not mess around with His children's lives. He always work things out for the good of those who love Him.

Someway, somehow, I will be lifted up and I will find myself in the perfect place where God wants me to be.

I am content.

"We also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character." Romans 5:3-4

Last minute memento of Dr. Joven Cuanang, head neurologist (center) and his dedicated doctor staff, before going home.

(I consider this experience the toughest challenge of my life. I had to fight to be strong for both Joe (my husband) and I, and all those who love him. Despite all the mixed emotions, I had to be clear minded in order to pray, raise money to pay the hospital bills, and make decisions for Joe and myself. I consider this, the greatest project of my life.)

In Feb. 14, 2007, my husband Joe, was diagnosed at the Makati Medical Center with a simple gastroenteritis. His symptoms were diarrhea, dizziness, vomiting, and tingling sensations in the fingertips. After receiving his antibacterial shot and other drug prescriptions, we were discharged from the hospital.

Joe hosted our church's Valentine’s party that same night but he was noticeably sick. After the party, we went to Diamond Hotel where we decided to celebrate our last Valentine's Day in the Philippines.

The following morning, Joe woke up again with feelings of dizziness. This time though, he was seeing double. When he stood up to go to the restroom, he vomited again. The hotel doctor and nurse came to administer dextrose to Joe. Despite this, Joe only got weaker such that he could no longer stand on his own. We then rushed him to the nearest hospital.

For the first three hours, no one was there to help me make arrangements with the hospital. Joe was admitted in the emergency room where things went from bad to worse. I was advised to confine him and so I had to leave him alone for some minutes to secure a room for him. When I came back, Joe was slumped in his bed, unable to kick himself up. His fingers were clawed in, his left eyelid was drooping, and his speech was completely slurred.

I then called the attention of the emergency doctor. I had a hunch that this wasn't a gastroenterology problem anymore. There must be something wrong with his brain. I suggested that doctor check if he was suffering a stroke. The doctor immediately conducted a CT scan on him. The results were negative.

Joe's first night in the hospital were one of the scariest nights of my life. By then, my family was with me. My sister and cousin were both graduate nurses. I knew it would make a lot of positive difference to have them with me. That night, Joe had a locked jaw. When he tried to correct it himself, his body started trembling in a seizure-like manner. The intern doctors gave him valium in increasing dosage. The tremors were frequent, in fact, each time he woke up from sleep. From that time on, in this long ordeal, I lost communication with my husband. Somehow I felt that it was going to be a long battle. I had to pray and get my strength from someone beyond myself -- God.

Soon the case was outside the gastrologist’s hands and into the neurologist’s hands.

With the help of my friends, I made a decision to transfer Joe to a better hospital--actually the best hospital in the Philippines. I knew that the bill would be high, but if Joe didn't receive better medical care, I would lose him. I thought to myself, "God will not give this to me if I couldn't handle it." By Divine Providence, his case was given to the head of the neurology department, the best neurologist in the hospital so to speak. I would later on learn that he was the neurologist of the President of the Philippines herself.

The doctors were decisive. They immediately intubated my husband upon knowing that he was only breathing 40% on his own. A team of specialists was assembled for Joe's case. There were 18 of them. Eighteen doctors who will combine their knowledge to try to salvage my husband's life.

Joe was then subjected to numerous diagnostic tests. None of them pointed to any specific kind of disease. To say it plainly, Joe's sickness was rare. The hospital has no record of a similar case. Meanwhile, my husband's condition worsened. He couldn't move, couldn't open his eyes, couldn't speak, couldn't breathe on his own. He was just lying there, seemingly asleep. They said he could hear me so I should continue to talk to him. After five days in the hospital, they told me that Joe had also finally lost his hearing. He was in coma and nobody knew what caused him to be like that.

Joe in coma

My days were spent in constant prayer. I knew that despite the doctors' expertise, my husband's life was in God's hand. It was before Him that I should plea my case to bring my husband back. I begged him in prayer, read the Bible for His promises which I held on to fervently. I knew that God never forgot His promises, but at that time, I felt like I needed to remind Him. And remind Him, I did. I contacted everyone I could contact to pray for him. Several of my friends came to pray with me.

Soon, everyone was praying. Churches upon churches came to visit and pray for my husband. People were e-mailing me from all around the world to encourage me. Churches prayed and fasted for Joe. It seemed like a rally was launched for Joe. A rally to bring him back. Somehow, I knew that God will not ignore the number of people praying for my husband.

Finally, a diagnosis was made, "Bickerstaff Brainstem Encephalitis," a rare autoimmune disease where the body's own antibodies attacks itself. The treatment available in the Philippines was "plasmapheresis." Joe's blood will be extracted from his body, the plasma will be filtered off, and new plasma will be given. While Joe was in coma, he continued to have seizures. These tore down his muscles, released toxins in his blood, and affected his kidneys. Soon, Joe had to have blood dialysis as well.

It was determined that Joe will have five sessions of plasmapheresis. After the five sessions, it was a waiting game. We were all waiting for Joe's body to respond to the treatment. After two family conferences with the doctors, we decided to fly Joe to the states. However, we would need to raise $160,000 to transport him via air ambulance. A doctor would later tell me that after the first family conference, he was thinking, “This guy has only three to four days to live.”

Despite all the emotional trauma I was going through at that time, I knew I had to be strong to make tough decisions. Should I bring Joe to the States? Where will I get the money? I have to raise the money. Should I allow the doctors to poke another hole on Joe's body for another treatment or should I just stop them and let life takes its natural course?

I had to do many things: sell the car, proceed with our move-out sale to raise money for hospital bills, e-mail many people to ask for help, coordinate with the lawyer to see if we can sell assets, see insurance benefits available, talk to the doctors for updates, budget money, buy some supplies in order to reduce hospital cost, etc. All the while, I was literally living in the hospital. I slept in the hospital's waiting lounge floors, together with family members of other patients.

Thank God for friends and thank God for strength. He surrounded me with people I could count on, delegate some tasks to in our time of need.

Friends with a message: Fight Joe, fight!

Ten days after plasmapheresis started, there was no sign of improvement. One sunday that I was at church, my sister and cousin stayed with Joe in the hospital. They did not tell me that Joe went down to GCS 3. GCS stands for Glascow Coma Scale. It ranges from 3 to 15. Three (3) is almost brain dead. Fifteen is like all of us --normal.

I had no idea that Joe went down this close to death. In fact, that day, I was feeling positive that Joe was showing signs of improvement. In the afternoon, a couple of friends visited him. They too noticed that Joe seemed to be responding. At round 8 pm, I was about to walk out of the NCCU (neuro critical care unit) after visiting hours, when a friend called my attention. Joe seemed to be waking up! With difficulty marked in his face, left arm and right leg lifted, he seemed to be trying to sit up on the bed. We called the doctor immediately and she cried, “It’s a miracle!” She immediately came in to talk try to talk to him. That evening, Joe jumped from GCS 3 to GCS 11, just when everyone thought he was about to expire.

Video of Joe when he just woke up

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Word spread quickly among the doctors and even the nurses in the hospital. At first they doubted if he was really waking up, so they did an EEG on him. An EEG monitors the activity of his brain. It’s also a way to find out if it was a seizure. Finally, the EEG doctor told me, I don’t think it’s a seizure. I think he’s really trying to wake up. Let’s keep on praying.”

From that time on, Joe’s recovery went on high speed. The doctors and nurses would enter and leave his room with big smiles on their faces. They called him the “star patient”. The talk of the town. A miracle. Doctors knew it was a miracle. They too have been praying for him and have been spending sleepless nights trying to “salvage” his life.

I remember my prayer of surrender to God one night. I said, “God if you are going to take Joe away, please take him away swiftly. But if you are going to restore him, please restore him swiftly too. I don't want to see him develop infections and sustain one wound after another because of all the tubes in his body.”

God did answer our prayers! One by one, he restored everything to Joe: his sense of hearing, his sight, his taste, his smell, his respiration, and now slowly, his movement. One doctor told me that people who go down to GCS 3 rarely recover fully. Some people went out of the hospital in a vegetative state. Joe was by far their most successful GCS-3 patient. He walked out of the hospital almost completely restored!

Finally going home after more than 1 month in the hospital.

God is so awesome!!! He was there with us through everything. Once when I was randomly reading my Bible, this scripture really struck me,

“I will not die but live, and will proclaim what the Lord has done. The Lord has chastened me severely, but he has not given me over to death.” Ps. 118:17-18

I knew back then (with much struggling in my faith) that Joe will not die. Instead, God will use his experience to glorify His name. Praise God for his wonderful will.

Joe was finally discharged from the hospital on March 26—which happened to be my birthday. Having him back to me is the greatest birthday gift from God. God has also provided a way for us to pay the hospital bill which reached to almost $50,000.

In my years of existence, I can honestly say that his experience was the greatest project of them all. My marriage and personal happiness were at stake, yet I had to gather my strength in order to:

1. Tap to a higher power -- an eternal source of hope, God;
2. Get people behind me and help me with all my responsibilities;
3. Raise money for the benefit of my own husband;
4. and keep my faith to move on whatever the results may be.

Thankfully, God is my God. I consider everything a blessing in disguise. And I consider this not only the greatest but the most successful project of my life.

P.S. For more pictures of Joe and his developments, please visit http://www.imagestation.com/album/pictures.html?id=2094039174

Article Posted at http://www.all-about-relationships.blogspot.com/